When brokenness was all that I built
and emptiness was all that was filling the cup
and gentleness was all a disguise
walk the way home it feels better alone am I alive

Then there was you
throwing the lifeline
i'm never the same
i'm breathing again

Clash of words kept the doors closed
crushed and I stop at the end of the road
close your eyes im chasin the wind
someone like you exist only in dreams am I alive

I never thought id see this night come
as your eyes showed me the light
I don’t look back now to what’s done
cos I know ill be alright

SEE THE VIDEO HERE

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=171113162581&ref=share

well well well.. after a long time.. i havent written anything here..

first things first "why" will i write.. hindi "what"
1.) i miss writing
mostly ng post ko ay nasa status lang ng facebook account ko. talk about "what's on your mind" and dito at "what's on your heart" hehehe..

2.) sinisipag ako magsulat
antagal ko na din tlg hindi nagsusulat ng mga nararamdaman yun tipong babalik-balikan mong basahin at mapapaisip. at maalala mong ito pala ang nangyari nun mga panahong iyon.

3.) pampatanggal ng stress
andaming trabaho. minsan hindi mo alam ano at sino uunahin mo. parati na lang ikaw. parati na lang ako. para sa akin ang pagsusulat ay kagaya din ng pagbabasa. may sarili kang mundo. na ikaw lang ang nakakarinig at nakakaintindi. mabasa man ng iba. na nais mong balik-balikan.

4.) nais kong malaman kung ano ang aking nararamdaman sa kasalukuyan.
gusto kong malaman at isipin kung tama ba ang aking nararamdaman. sa kasalukuyan may aalis at may parating. may mga tanong na gusto kong marinig, kahit hindi na malaman ang mga kasagutan. malamang ako lang nakaka-alam at makakasagot. siguro panahon na naman lang ang makakasagot.

5.) gusto ko magpapansin
choz!!!!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=128093&l=353a3c9f70&id=558772174

I AM INTO FACEBOOK.. ADD ME UP.. MY CURRENT BLOGS AND PHOTOS ARE POSTED ON THAT SITE.

..love is love when i am with you..

you easily charm your way… into my heart, into my life, into my being and into the very core of my sanity. your smell is so magical, that all my senses are suddenly in unison. i have never been to heaven to compare heaven when i am with you. i promise with all that is left in me that i will wait for my someday with you. time is on my side whenever i hold your hands. space won’t fill-up the enchanting way you smile. the stars can not contain to shine the way your eyes starts to twinkle. i hear music in your breathing. love is love when i am with you.

"All I can suggest is to forget about yourself & just think of your people. It's always the people who make things happen."- CORAZON AQUINO

we know integrity when we see it and we respond to it. - JIM PAREDES

don't be so sucked-up with your own life. our nation needs saving from ourselves. lol. cory's death is getting into me.

How many times did I pray
You'd find me
How many wishes on a star
Gazing off into the dark
Dreaming I'd see your face
Safe at home unafraid
Captured in your embrace

So many times
When my heart was broken
Visions of you
Would keep me strong
You were with me all along
Guiding my every step
You are all that I am
And I'll never forget

Chorus:
It was you who first believed
In all that I was made to be
It was you looking in my eyes
You held my hand
And showed me life
And I've never been the same
Since you first believed

There were times
When I'd thought I'd lost you
Fearing forever was a dream
but it wasn't what it seemed
Placing your hand in mine
You could see in the dark
You were guiding my heart

[Chorus]

How many times did I pray
You'd find me
How many wishes on a star.

july isnt a good month for me and my bestfriend. we just cant wait for august to start.. stress at work and life after that. ermmm..

but it gets better and better as i always say. we just need to 'adjust' and make the best out of anything..

been complaining that hey i miss taking pictures and bes been complaining as well that she misses writing. hmmm.. so me being the 'sensitive' lately thought about of project 'twin diary'.. its kinda mushy and baduy but hey its my idea.. so i dont care wat u think.. i know its kinda elementarish or highschoolish.. i just want my bes to be able to write again.. its like sharing a diary with a friend.. share your thoughts and heart.. and life of course.. one diary two writers.. hehehe..

since last week was looking for my passport. (ermm.. yeah for watever reason).. i knew it is inside the stuff where u put ur 'chuvanesses' but i cant find the key to the 'chuvaness locker'..

being the dory i am di ko din alam san ko nakita yun 'key' .. basta nahanap ko yun 'key'.. so there it is my passport.. i also saw some letters from my bestfriend.. wow nostalgic ito.. funny thing is that she used to love writing letters and poems.. but eversince she started working, i guess worked sucked that writing skill out of her.. hahaha.. ermmm resulting to her stern-ness lately.. 

i read a couple of them letters.. it was good to reminisce childish-ness.. thats the start of my idea... for her to let her write and pour her heart again..

i need a plan.. so there saturday after office we chilled.. but this time not on a cozy restaurant or comfy coffe house.. we went to the nearest park - u.p.. i just listened to my ipod and stare at the clouds.. took some pictures of soccer players and some grass and tires and orange cones (i miss it so much kaya kahit ano nipatulan ko na) we watched people and laugh at them (being the ermmm we are).. nice thing about having a bestfriend is that you can talk about everything or nothing at all and still have the superb and awesome time ever.

then i gave her the "twin diary" and let her read my thoughts for the passed few days.. of course she cried.. there it is.. i saw the "hidden" longingness of her heart to be published.. and then she started writing again..

WHO ARE YOU??? my best friend is a writer and me a wanna be photographer ..

that was the perfect chill for me to stop and stare and know who you are..

What made give your last cookie away
Or help me clean my room all day
Why would let me use your stereo
Or save me the middle of your Oreo

Why would you always try to be
there when I really really need you there to care
You're always willing to share

Love makes a friend be a friend like you
Love takes a friendship and turns it into
Something to last your whole life through
Love makes a friend be a friend like you

What makes you wanna give your heart away
What makes open up and say
All of the feelings that you hold inside
All of the secrets that you try to hide

Why would you always try to be
There when I really really need you there to care
You're always willing to share

Love makes a friend be a friend like you
Love takes a friendship and turns it into
Something to last for all life through
Love makes a friend be a friend like you
Love makes a friend be a friend like you

woke-up hearing the heavy raindrops and knowing that a public transportation strike is on. i said to myself lemme stay at home and not go to work, sounds legitimate excuse. hehehe. but then every monday morning i feel this urge. the feeling of not wanting to go to work. so yeah get up girl. went down for my usual grind. while taking a bath, i hear mom's anger shouting at me. now, what did i do? last time i checked i slept early last night.

ayayay! the usual frustration of people for other people. (thats another story right there) but its always like this, its not even my fault. its always me who get scolded for the mistake of some human. now, i aint complaining or anything. i can not clean up the mess of whoever. i mean give me a break. its their life. its their choice. come on now, people have their own choices in life, we can not dictate, i can not dictate.

i could have turned back and retaliate this morning and not go to work. i was this close of yelling for a cab. i wanted to go to bes' place and make sumbong and cry the whole day. BUT NO i need to BRAVE THE STORM OF JULY 13, 2009. yes i did cry, so what, i am human. but a brave human that is.

oh by the way highway it is flooding in manila area.. hahaha.. awesome monday!!!

oh-ha!!! so whatever u r goin through right now you can be brave for yourself and know that He is holding your hands while saying Be brave because He is there and He is near.

What's the way of love?
Tell me your fiction
Tell me your lies
Say to me now, you'll never forget this night
I'm feeling emotionless
My head's so clear
My enemies aren't, the one I fear
You know your kiss confuses
This troubling soul
And I found out
That we're all breaking hearts
That we're all broken hearts

[CHORUS:]
If only love could find us all
If only hearts didn't have to fall
We can't mislead to make things right
So instead we'll sleep alone tonight

What's the way of love?
You are thinking I'm crazy
But you're blushing of lust
I've heard a lot of nice things,
but tell me which ones I'm to trust?
These walls we made are glass
And they have been known to crack
But until then
You'll keep pushing my way
And I'll keep pushing you away

[CHORUS]

If you want to take a chance
And try to make things right
You better have a reason to be loved
We all want something more
And it is worth fighting for...

[CHORUS]

And if somehow fate were in my hands
Would it be enough to understand
Why we feel lost in a world so small
If only love could find find us all...

Making my way downtown
Walking fast, faces pass and I'm homebound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making a way through the crowd

And I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder

If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass me by
Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you tonight

It's always times like these 
When I think of you
And wonder if you ever think of me 
Cause everything's so wrong and I don't belong
Living in your precious memory

Cause I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder

If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass me by, oh
Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you tonight

And I, I don't wanna let you know
I, I drown in your memory
I, I don't wanna let this go
I, I don't

Making my way downtown
Walking fast, faces pass and I'm homebound
Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making a way through the crowd

And I still need you 
And I still miss you 
And now I wonder 

If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass us by
Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles 
If I could just see you, oh, oh

If I could fall into the sky
Do you think time would pass me by
Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you
If I could just hold you tonight

do you know a person who loves fixing things.
what if that person needs fixing too.
who will fix that person.
will he/she ever get tired of fixing things, the same things.
where does he/she find the strength to fix things.
will he/she use the same tools.
where does he/she find hope that all things will be fixed soon.
how does he/she know that he can fix it.
will it be better than the old stuff.
can he/she fix everything.

if not then its still gonna be alright in the end. i know for sure.

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you 

half-human..
half-life..
half-cooked..
half-inspired..
half-hearted..
half of me is you..

THIS IS MY BABY LOVE. MY ANGEL. MY LIFE. MY HOPE. MY MIRACLE. THE SWEETEST SMILE AND HUG IN THE WORLD BELONGS TO HIM. I LOVE HIM PERIOD. HAHAHA.

THE KUYA I NEVER HAD. AKALAIN MONG PINSAN KO PALA ANG ISA SA MGA TIGASIN NG MLCA. HAHAHA. DAHIL SA KANYA I KNEW IT NA MAY DUGO TALAGA AKONG PASAWAY  EH. HAHAHA.

SCHOOL MATES PALA KAMI AND CHURCHMATES. PERO DAHIL GOOD GIRL PA AKO NOON MGA PANAHON NA YUN HINDI PA NAGTATAGPO ANG AMING LANDAS.



PAREHO KAMI NG KALOKOHAN NITO (LOVELIFE!!!) PERO PAREHO DIN KAMI PAGNAGSERYOSO NA. PATAY TAYO JAN.

(KAGAYA KO) SUPER SWEET DIN SYA AT ANG LAKAS NG CHARMS. AT WAG KALIMUTAN NA MALAKING FLIRT DIN SYA! OK MALAKI BAYAD NYA DITO EH. HAHAHA.

LIFE IS FUN WITH HIM AS IN LALO NA ANG MGA BLOOPERS NYA. IM PROUD NA PINSAN KO SYA KAHIT NA SUBRANG LAYO NG CONNECTION NG RELATIVE BLOOD. HE IS MORE THAN A COUSIN AND A FRIEND TO ME.

Wait it out till the light
Take a breathe, say good night
But don’t ever go away

Wait around to find the time
Only you can take what’s mine
But don’t ever go away

I’ll be waiting….I need to let it go

(chorus)
Fade it out into the light
All these years we never get it right
I need to let it go

No more reasons to defy
That I believed that you were mine
I need to let it go

A chance to change or stay the same
One night with out the blame
That don’t ever go away

Only you can make it right
To walk away with out a fight
But don’t ever go away

I’ll be waiting…I need to let it go

(chorus)

I wish you’d let me go…

ok this is a very very mushy post, cos its father's day and my dad's birthday on monday.
1.) i miss being punished
2.) i miss having a curfew
3.) i miss him shouting at me
4.) i miss being afraid and scared lalo na pagmay mali akong ginawa
5.) i miss na walang kumakampi sa akin
6.) i miss being a daughter to my dad
7.) i just miss having a dad

done without tears falling.. hahahaha